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Frankly speaking.....
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JG300-Ascout
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Joined: Jan 05, 2005
Posts: 6257
Location: Cyberspace
PostPosted: Fri Oct 06, 2006 3:19 pm
Post subject: Frankly speaking.....

A man walks into the street and manages to get a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Frank."

Passenger: "Who?"

Cabbie: "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right - all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank - every single time."

Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."

Cabbie: "Not Frank. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano."

Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special"

Cabbie: "There's more.......He had a memory like a computer. Could remember everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out."

Passenger. "Wow, some guy then."

Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams, not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them."

Passenger. "Mmm, there's not many like him around."

Cabbie: "And he knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good and never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too - the perfect man!"

Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?

Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank."

Passenger: "Then how do you know so much about him?"

Cabbie: "I married his %$@&+ widow.

_________________
"All facts go to clearly prove that Shades is a thrice-cursed traitor & mentally deranged person steeped in inveterate enmity toward mankind"
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JG300-fr8ycat
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Joined: Mar 13, 2005
Posts: 1528
Location: Los Angeles
PostPosted: Fri Oct 06, 2006 5:32 pm
Post subject: Re: Frankly speaking.....

Laughing
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JG300-Dan736
Power User

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Joined: Jan 26, 2005
Posts: 484
Location: Burlinton Ont
PostPosted: Fri Oct 06, 2006 6:56 pm
Post subject: Re: Frankly speaking.....

Lol,now thats gotta suck

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eagles may soar but a weasel won't get sucked into a jet engine
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JG300-Stoopy
Power User

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Joined: Jan 05, 2005
Posts: 5840
Location: Group W bench
PostPosted: Sat Oct 07, 2006 11:30 am
Post subject: Re: Frankly speaking.....

Haha!! Not bad!

I usually don't forward email jokes but th'wifey showed me this one and it ain't bad:

Bad Day at Work?

When you have an "I Hate My Job" day, try this. On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section and purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson. Be very sure you get this brand.

When you get home, lock your doors, draw the curtains and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed. Change into very comfortable clothing and sit in your favorite chair, open the package and remove the thermometer.

Now, carefully place it on a table or a surface so that it will not become chipped or broken. Now the fun part begins. Take out the literature and read it carefully. You will notice that in small print there is a statement, "Every Rectal Thermometer made by
Johnson & Johnson is personally tested". Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times, "I am so glad I do not work in quality control at Johnson & Johnson."

HAVE A NICE DAY AND REMEMBER, THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE ELSE WITH A JOB THAT IS MORE OF A PAIN IN THE ASS THAN YOURS.

_________________
"Once your reputation is ruined, you can live quite freely."
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Shadow_Bshwackr
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Joined: Jan 21, 2005
Posts: 7015
Location: Central Illinois, USA
PostPosted: Sat Oct 07, 2006 12:08 pm
Post subject: Re: Frankly speaking.....

ROFL...great stuff!!
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