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Abbott & Costello in the Computer age :: Archived
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Uhu_Fledermaus
Aircraft Demolition Expert

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Joined: Nov 28, 2004
Posts: 4369
Location: Blaricum, The Netherlands ~GMT+1
PostPosted: Sat Mar 29, 2008 11:46 am
Post subject: Abbott & Costello in the Computer age

You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello,
and too old to REALLY understand computers, to fully appreciate this.

For those of us who sometimes get flustered by our computers,
please read on.

If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today,
their famous sketch, 'Who's on First?' might have turned out something like this:


COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.

ABBOTT: Your computer?

COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.

ABBOTT: What about Windows?

COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

ABBOTT: I just did.

COSTELLO: You just did what?

ABBOTT: Recommend something.

COSTELLO: You recommended something?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: For my office?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yes, ! for my office!

ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows

COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

ABBOTT: Word.

COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOTT: Word in Office.

COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue 'W'.

COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue 'w' if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

ABBOTT: One copy.

COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

(A few days later)

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click on 'START'............

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Kitform
Bar Maid

Offline Offline
Joined: Jan 22, 2005
Posts: 2011
Location: Cleveland. UK.
PostPosted: Sat Mar 29, 2008 11:49 am
Post subject: Re: Abbott & Costello in the Computer age

LOL

Click "START"...

Mr. Green Mr. Green
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401RCAF_Jel
Power User

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Joined: Jan 05, 2005
Posts: 614
Location: Hiding in Sherwood Forest
PostPosted: Sat Mar 29, 2008 11:52 am
Post subject: Re: Abbott & Costello in the Computer age

LOL yeah i'm old enough...just Wink

I remember them being played on Saturday mornings here in UK when i was a young whipper snapper Shocked

_________________
System: Mobo - Asus P5N32 E-SLI, RAM - Corsair 2GB 6400C4 DDR2, Graphics - GeForce 8800GTS 320mb GDDR3 PCI-Express, Proccessor - Intel CPU Core 2 Duo E6600 2.40GHz 1066FSB LGA775 4MB cache.
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bsmart
Power User

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Joined: Jan 23, 2006
Posts: 2523
Location: Central Maryland
PostPosted: Sat Mar 29, 2008 9:20 pm
Post subject: Re: Abbott & Costello in the Computer age

Well back in the days of only 3 TV Channels in most places (If you were lucky. Away from the cities you sometimes had one even with a very tall antenna)
Abbot and Costello movies were regular filler on Sunday afternoon (along with Bogart)
Saturday morning was the time for Sky King, The Big Picture, and Rocky Jones, Space Ranger

_________________
Bob Smart ([email protected])
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Doug_Kibbey
Power User

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Joined: Jan 23, 2006
Posts: 4678
Location: The Great Satan
PostPosted: Sat Mar 29, 2008 11:27 pm
Post subject: Re: Abbott & Costello in the Computer age

- bsmart
Well back in the days of only 3 TV Channels in most places (If you were lucky. Away from the cities you sometimes had one even with a very tall antenna)
Abbot and Costello movies were regular filler on Sunday afternoon (along with Bogart)
Saturday morning was the time for Sky King, The Big Picture, and Rocky Jones, Space Ranger


Of course, Bob recalls the days when you could only experience listening to Abbott and Costello sitting around the radio. Laughing
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sweets
Power User

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Joined: Dec 18, 2005
Posts: 811

PostPosted: Sun Mar 30, 2008 12:10 pm
Post subject: Re: Abbott & Costello in the Computer age

Abbott and Costello ? who? Rolling Eyes
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Uhu_Fledermaus
Aircraft Demolition Expert

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Joined: Nov 28, 2004
Posts: 4369
Location: Blaricum, The Netherlands ~GMT+1
PostPosted: Sun Mar 30, 2008 12:17 pm
Post subject: Re: Abbott & Costello in the Computer age

here ya go Sweets

au.youtube.com/watch?v=sShMA85pv8M

Wink
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sweets
Power User

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Joined: Dec 18, 2005
Posts: 811

PostPosted: Sun Mar 30, 2008 2:03 pm
Post subject: Re: Abbott & Costello in the Computer age

GR8 thanks Fled they r funny guys! but kind of old right? Mr. Green I ask my Pops if he knew who they were an he laughed he said who doesnt! he said they r Classic duh! Mr. Green
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EW_PooFlinga
Power User

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Joined: Jan 27, 2008
Posts: 22
Location: Secret Ape Tree-House
PostPosted: Sun Mar 30, 2008 2:50 pm
Post subject: Re: Abbott & Costello in the Computer age

OLD?!?!?

They went to school with Fled's kids.
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Shadow_Bshwackr
Janitor

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Joined: Jan 21, 2005
Posts: 7019
Location: Central Illinois, USA
PostPosted: Sun Mar 30, 2008 8:24 pm
Post subject: Re: Abbott & Costello in the Computer age

ROFL Poo...lol
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sweets
Power User

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Joined: Dec 18, 2005
Posts: 811

PostPosted: Sun Apr 06, 2008 3:38 pm
Post subject: Re: Abbott & Costello in the Computer age

Shocked guess they r really old then Mr. Green
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